Wednesday, August 12, 2009

Is anyone really surprised?

With the news that another Thugby League player has decided that smacking his teammates around at training and the opposition on the weekend for that matter, wasn't enough to appease his animalistic appetite, it looks like we have a clear leader for the next Dick of the Week. Was anyone honestly surprised with what's gone down in Melbourne? The only thing that surprises me is that it has been over 2 weeks without anything like this happening. Too much money and time on their hands, just lock the pricks up!

Of course I was there!
Ah, yes, last Saturday - the 8th. A beautiful August day. Had nothing on. So, yes, why not head over to Brookie to watch the Mighty Eagles thump those Bunnies and charge into the top four...

Actually Cracko, I was there - and I do agree with you on one thing - they were "useless bastards". What the #&%@ happened?! The performance was nothing short of inept. Pathetic. Spineless. On a scale of 1 to 10, they were a -15! So bad in fact that I left with 10 minutes left!

Before their defeat against the Tigers, they were in prime position to steal a top four spot. They were pencilled in to beat the Tigers - and the Rabbitohs. The result? Two losses! No chance of a top four spot - and if they can't even beat the Roosters this Saturday, then I will personally nominate them for Dicks of the Week!
The Dazzler

I always told mum school was no good
Is this honestly happening again? Another Thugby League player smashing his other half around the head over who knows what. Lets get this point out there straight away, I don't care who you are, or what they did, you never hit a woman, especially a good looking one!

I'm not sure what kind of environment these dicks were brought up in but where I come from you don't lay your hands on a woman. It's a basic fact of life, and yet the men of the NRL are sent to special classes where they are taught how to treat woman and deal with the money they have. What the f@#* is up with that? Who the f@#* needs f@#*ing lessons on how to treat women? Or any human being for that matter?

There is only one way to punish them really, cut their balls off with a rusty spoon and feed them to them!

Please just stand down now
Wow, just when you think the Australian selectors couldn't get any more f@#*ed up, their chairman Andrew Hilditch has now come and set a new standard for bullshit! For weeks the sporting public cried out for Stuart Clark to be added to the test team, and they finally do it for the 4th test, and guess what, we win. Now sure Stewie didn't come in and take 20 wickets, but he isn't that kind of bowler. The guy is in the mould of "OOH AHH Glen McGrath", he ties up one end with quality and consistancy. Thats the reason why the other bowlers were able to take wickets, thats the reason we won.

But for Hilditch this is not enough, that or he is watching a different game. He has come out and claimed that Australia's bowling future lies with Mitchell Johnson, Ben Hilfenhaus and Peter Siddle. Dude, what the f@#* are you smoking? How can you see no place for Stewie? Now if that isn't enough he tops it all off with this absolute cracker of a quote
"I've got to say from a selection point of view I've been thrilled with the Ashes, I think it's gone particularly well"
You Sir, are a f@#*wit!

Some oral pleasures
'I owe a lot to my parents, especially my mother and father.'
(Shane Wakelin).

'Nobody in football should be called a genius. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein.'
(Mick Malthouse - Collingwood).

'I'm going to graduate on time, no matter how long it takes.'
(Peter Bell - Fremantle - on his University Law studies).

'You guys line up alphabetically by height.' and 'You guys pair up in groups of three, then line up in a circle.'
(Barry Hall Sydney Captain at training).

'I can't really remember the names of the clubs that we went to.'
Brock Maclean ( Melbourne ) on whether he had visited the Pyramids during his visit to Egypt :

'He's a guy who gets up at six o'clock in the morning regardless of what time it is.'
(Kevin Sheedy on James Hird).

'It's basically the same, just darker.'
Jonathan Brown, on night Grand Finals vs. Day Games

'I told him, 'Son, what is it with you. Is it ignorance or apathy?' He said, 'Barass, I don't know and I don't care.'
Ron Barassi talking about Gary Cowton

'I want to kick 70 or 80 goals this season, whichever comes first.'
Barry Hall ( Sydney ) when asked about the upcoming season:

'Luke Hodge - the 21 year old, who turned 22 a few weeks ago'
(Dermott Brereton).

' Chad had done a bit of mental arithmetic with a calculator.'
(Mark Williams).

'We actually got the winning goal three minutes from the end but then they scored.'
(Ben Cousins, West Coast Eagles).

'I've never had major knee surgery on any other part of my body.'
(Luke Darcy).

'That kick was absolutely unique, except for the one before it which was identical.'
(Dermott Brereton).

'Sure there have been injuries and deaths in football - but none of them serious.'
(Adrian Anderson).

'If history repeats itself, I should think we can expect the same thing again.'
(Andrew Demetriou).

'I would not say he (Chris Judd) is the best centreman in the AFL but there are none better.'
(Dermott Brereton).

'I never comment on umpires and I'm not going to break the habit of a lifetime for that prat.'
(Terry Wallace).

Garry Lyon : ' Have you ever thought of writing your autobiography?'
David Swartz: 'On what?'

'Well, either side could win it, or it could be a draw.'
(Dermott Brereton).

'Strangely, in slow motion replay, the ball seemed to hang in the air for even longer.'
(Dermott Brereton).

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