Monday, August 24, 2009

The page that wants to punch all it's Pommy mates

Well it happened, I was hoping that any Ashes comments could be left until tomorrow due to the Aussie's showing that fighting spirit that we are so well known for, but to no avail, the Ashes are gone. Along with the number 1 ranking (behind Sri Lanka, really?). This is one little black duck that thinks we need to loose alot more than that. How about half a team and the entire selectors panel? Anyway, don't be shy to let your opinions be heard, send them on in!

King of the Week

Steve Hooker
Injured so badly that he could only attempt 2 jumps.....and still won gold!
Whats that? What about the English Cricket Team?
Go and get f@#*ed!

Dick of the Week

Clive Palmer - Owner of Gold Coast United
Clive wants to RESTRICT crowd numbers to all United's home games to 5,000 spectators all to save on a State Government levy of $3.15 per ticket, which covers the cost of train and bus rides to matches.
This guy is the 4th richest man in Australia, worth over $6 Billion, and he is counting pennies? You Sir, are a Dick!
Footnote - Actual picture of Clive Palmer

Get in line mate
Merv Hughes - "People expect Australia to win inside 3-4 days, but that's not happening. Added to that Australia are losing test matches, but guess what people, welcome to the real world"

Your next job will require you to line up at your local Centrelink office you fat f@#*, welcome to the real world!

Spare a thought for me
OK OK they did it. England won the ashes. Woo freakin hoo. Luckily for the Australian team they’re on a plane out of here! Who gets stuck with the gloating poms? Me. And 7 billion other Australians living in London. I actually had some guys point and laugh, when through their drunken stupor they figured out I was Australian. And as if that wasn’t the worst thing, what the hell was Warney thinking with his commentary? Quoting Dumb and Dumber in your commentary doesn’t make us look any better. I could handle losing, but I’m not sure the shame of Shane Warne can be laughed away. I’m going to hibernate until this blows over.

Glory-fied Spectating
The guy who started this website asked me to do a report on yesterday’s Glory-Jets game. I was there. But it wasn’t the game that really got to me.

You see, the same friend got me thinking…have I become a sports snob? You know the types – the ones who sit in the comfy confines of those corporate boxes. The ones who peer down from aloft while the rest of you plebs huddle together on wet seats with just a thin sheet of plastic separating them from the sleet and rain. Yeah, I’m one of those wankers!

You see I’ve been spoilt. I work in an industry that gets invited to sporting events. It’s an industry where you impress people by exposing them to live sports, all while plying them with free booze and food. We’re a shallow bunch, but it’s business. Schmoozing we like to call it.

I’ve been schmoozing for over a decade now. I’d like to believe that I’ve never paid for a ticket to a sporting event – NBL, Tri-Nations, NRL, AFL, A-League, even the horse races. And if I have to pay, I’ve whinged and moaned the whole way through the demoralising Ticketek process…”What? You want my f#*%in’ Visa card?”

Anyway, back to the game in question. On Sunday, I watched Perth Glory take on the Newcastle Jets in the comfort of a Corporate Suite. For the 99% of you that don’t know, a Corporate Suite is the next level up from a Corporate Box. The bonus of a corporate suite, among other things, is that it also has a TV so I could watch the Dockers game during half time. Yeah, I had free tickets to that too.

With free beer in hand, the rain began to fall. As it did, I sat back and watched 8500 people desperately don their waterproof attire. Like turtles retreating into their shells – the plebs now sat hunched under their feeble cover as they peered through the cascading water that fell from their brow. It was cold too, the poor souls. I felt for them. A shiver went through me, but I think that was the draft coming in through the open door…I got them to close it).

It was at that moment that I stopped. What the hell was I thinking? I had to snap out of this delirious state of pity. Surely not all sports fans were created equal. I had to remind myself that these fans probably don’t know any better anyway. Their idea of comfort at the footy is sitting on a cushion.

Now, please don’t judge me. As a sports snob, I do understand the need for pleb-level seating. Because if it weren’t for those 8500 die-hard Glory fans, where would the atmosphere have been today? Where would the mighty roar have come from when Pelligrino blasted home the goal in the 73rd minute? Where would the spine-tingling rendition of our National Anthem be without the backing vocals of 40,000 Wallabies fans at Subiaco Oval? Who would sledge Strauss when he drops a catch on the MCG boundary? Who would scream out those two-syllable footy chants – Cow-boys, Man-lee, Bron-cos? And who would wave around those homemade banners and slap together those ridiculous boom sticks? It’s the plebs, God bless them.

Now, as I get down off my high horse, I want to thank you. This forum has allowed me to look inside myself. Yes, I do realise I have it good. But deep down inside we are still all the same. ‘How’ you ask? Well, Glory got up two-nil today over the Jets, right? And my mate…well he’s a Jets fan. You see, that’s more satisfying than free beer in a corporate suite any day!

More Please…
It was the best game I have seen for a long time.

And for once, it lived up to the hype.

I went to the Sydney Football Stadium last Friday to that game – and both sides must be congratulated for providing such an epic battle. Both forward packs were first rate. No quarter was given, and none was asked. The determination of the Tigers, especially in the second half – given that the Tigers winger Tuiaki left the field in the first half – and that their other winger Beau Ryan played out the game with a serious knee injury.

In addition, the tries were first class - especially Benji Marshall’s effort to set up their first try was breathless. Chris Lawrence’s flick pass to set up a try for John Morris was impressive as well.

And then, there was Jarryd Hayne.

Now I didn’t see his display against the Warriors last week but from all reports it was a 10/10 performance.

If that was the case, his effort on Friday night was 20/10. It was simply that good.

The atmosphere was already electric enough, but every time he touched the ball the noise intensified tenfold – so loud that I feared for my hearing! Seriously though, he is the complete footballer – if he isn’t scoring tries, he is setting them up, or effortlessly carving up the defence in broken play, or making try savers in the last line of defence or even showing off his great kicking game. Remember he made two 40/20 kicks in the match and he made them with very little effort…

And then, when the game was on the line, like the greats such as Lockyer, Joey Johns and Co, he delivered with a wonderful piece of individual brilliance that will be talked about for a long time. To give you an idea of the effect that he is having on the game right now, whey that try was scored it wasn’t just the Eels fans standing and applauding – but it was everyone. Even the Tigers supporters with the game, and possibly their season gone, stood and applauded.

In a season where the off-field antics of a number of boofheads have given the NRL a black eye, Jarryd Hayne has been the savour of season 2009.

Give him the Dally M Medal now.

Overall, if that game on Friday night is the entrĂ©e for what’s to come in the next few weeks, than bring on the main course!
The Dazzler

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